Washing Machine

I am afraid to write, afraid to write it down.

I and so many people I know are feeling what we have termed, the washing machine.

All kinds of experiences , emotions, and triggers that I thought were put to rest long ago are resurfacing and parading around hoping for engagement. I have choices. Sometimes I just watch and allow things to stroll on by. Sometimes they get so in my face that i human them, i feel the emotion or trigger and i feel it big. I have been learning some skills (from Sora Schilling and others) that have to do with feeling, gaining the wisdom and transforming, that is really helping me.

It no longer has to be one or the other, enlightenment or human. I am learning how much I love this way of being human and know that “the washing machine” is worth the discomfort.

And now I am laughing because I was concentrating on the disorientation it causes, the swirling and tumbling, rather than, wow, you put clothes in the washing machine to wash the dirt and stains away.

So, today I am going to say, thank you washing machine.

When I finish this cycle, I want to be laid in the sun and wind to dry, not put in the dryer, please.

Image from my mom’s town Homer AK